Get A Lil' Action In...

Hmmm... it's Saturday evening and I'm kinda stumped on what to do. Bozzys, one of Rocky's famous hot spots, is closing its doors after one final hurrah tonight. Should I go? Would I be doing a disservice to my many "fond" memories if I didn't? Could the disrepect demonstrated by not going be considered an act of treason against Rocky Mountain House? Well, if it was an issue of that, then Fuck No; I'd be staying home. Besides, Bozzys is merely in the midst of a change in ownership. It'll be re-opened as The Fish Bowl at a later date. No, the issue at hand is a lot different than civic pride or a lack therof. Tonight will be a big occasion. A big occasion means lots of people. Lots of people means lots of girls. That's good! But lots of people also means lots of guys, and lots of guys means lots of bullshit. That's bad. What it boils down to is a case of eye candy versus rampant cases of testosterone poisoning. It's a very complicated decision, as you can see.

And lest you think I'm some sex-crazed buffoon whose whole-hearted belief in the Law of Averages will lead him to harass every person within fifty feet that has a vagina, perhaps I should explain myself better. No more do I go to the clubs/bars to annoy women with my pathetic advances. Now... I Come To Watch. My approach is best summed up by the song I Like to Watch by Canada's own Prozzak:

I like to watch
I like the way you bounce bounce
I like to watch
Ya ya groove 'n' move it
I like to watch
Shake it if you've got it lady
Here's my confession
I like to watch your hot box

Uh... except for that last line. I don't know what the fuck that's about. Hey, hold on a second. What are the benefits of insisting that I'm a staring, drooling pervert instead of a sex-crazed buffoon? Oh man, why do I keep painting myself into these corners?